bummer.

uggggh. need to vent.

does anyone know what the term "BEST FRIEND" means?! 4 times in my life i thought i had what a "bf" is suppose to be... and everytime got COMPLETELY f'd over.

-one kissed a very serious boyfriend
-one chose her boyfriend over me, who she ended up dumping soon after (apparently
she could be friends with me and have her boyfriend at the same time.)
-one stole tooons of my things including a LOT of money
-and now one just decided that she no longer wants to be friends with me bc of who one of my friends is!

i am so sick of feeling like this. why is it so hard to find a friend that truely loves and cares for you? i cared..and still care deeply for those girls, so how can they just drop me like I'm no one to them?! it's a very lonely feeling. i do have a lot of great friends but i don't really have that one person i can call at any time and tell everything to anymore (besides H of corse). i would love to have another Maid of Honor bc my sister is only 16 and can't really handle all of the MOH duties alone...but i dont really think that even any of my close friends would really qualify. MOH isn't someone you just replace. im extremely hurt, i really didn't think this friendship would end.

pretty depressed...going to go drown my sorrows in some mint chocolate chip icecream.

When it Rains it POURS!

So much has happened since I last wrote...

Monday
Went to the park with Brodie (we have an awesome park in our front yard!)

Thursday

Lost my job at Chuy's! I was soo sick of that place, and coming home late then getting up early for school...not sad about leaving, just sad about lack of cash money!

Saturday

Went out to eat with Jess and Parker, then went to Alfred Angelo to watch Sonia try on dresses. She found a great dress, she looked gorgeous.

Sunday

Went to church and then Harland's family came over and we grilled out...then went to see Date Movie.

Tuesday

My brudder came over!

Wednesday

Hailee came over and WOW was that a crazy day. Her son, Blayden, has never met his grandparents, (from the dads side) so we spent two hours looking them up online. We finally got ahold of them and they didn't even know Blayden existed! Exstatic doesn't even describe how they felt. They drove from OK the next day to meet him. I am so glad I got to be a part of that! Love you Hails!

Thursday

Took the hardest test of my LIFE! Almost every single thing about hemotology... but made a 97 bc of a 10 point curve! haha

Friday

Amber and Kendall came over for lunch. We ate pizza and watched The Lovely Bones...bc I missed her bones. Jess, Parker, and Cody came over later and we did the usual...play board games haha. Then Harland, Brodie, and I went to the Chili's I use to work at and got some free food.

Saturday

Went to look at cars bc I can't pay my car payment, so most likely we're going to give my car back and just trade Harlands truck in for a car for me..and be a one car family. YAY. How are we going to do that? No idea. So we drove a bunch of cars and when we were on our way home I realized my phone wasn't in my pocket anymore. Son of a biscuit-eating-bulldog. Went back and it was no where to be found! urrrg. Later, I drove Harlands new truck (a manual!!) to Erica's and chatted, and got a haircut! :) She's the only one that's cut my hair in the last 2 years! LOVE you girlie! Then drove to my uncle and aunts house to watch my cousins. Harland supprised me by coming over and keeping me company :) My cousins are ADORABLE. I painted the girls nails, watched a barbie movie, read them stories, and tickled their backs. Conversations with a 3 and 4 year old are priceless. Audrey (3) says things like "It takes SO long to drive to Kansas, like 50 SECONDS!" and "Brittany, you're the best." She cuddled with me on the couch and put my arm around hers, while Allie sat next to me but didn't want to be cuddled. Then they talked about their dog Carlos having a boyfriend in Heaven, and when Allie had to go to the bathroom, Auds said, "THIS is going to take a while!" HAHA they just crack me up. After we put the kids to bed, Harland and I relaxed and watched Shawskank Redemption. SUCH a good movie!

Sunday

Church with Harlands fam, then went to Isabella's (one of Harlands' Goddaughters) 4th Bday party. It was great to see Taylor again, it's been a LONG time!

Then we went to Harlands softball game

That's Daddy in the background. I know, I should be a professional.

Today

Got out of the shower with Brodie, NAKED, and Hailee was in my room. hahaha. That was a nice supprise! She had a bunch of clothes for Brodie...and then she dropped a bomb. She's moving to OKLAHOMA!!! :( She wants to be closer to her sons family which is great, but not great for me :(
-----------------------------------------------
So when it rains it pours...

-lost my job

-lost my cell

-lost that closeness with a best friend

-lost a friend to OKLAHOMA

-oh...and got a friggin ticket.

But a lot of good has happened too...

Harland and I have only fought really about one thing in our whole relationship (besides smoking haha)..which is his drinking. He doesn't drink often but when he does... another person comes out. So after making some stupid decisions, we talked and decided we are just not going out without each other anymore. It's just not healthy in a relationship (unless you can do it right, and most couples can't.) There are certain times of corse when we will...for a few hours but it's definitely not going to be how it has been. We went to church last week and Pastor Bryan said that he felt that he was there to talk to someone, that someone needed his prayers and that if anyone wanted to come to the front to get a blessing, they should. So at the end of the sermon I was getting up to leave, and he said, "babe, I'm going to go to the front." I was like what?! So I went with him and he said that he has not been the spouse that I deserve and that he wants Gods help to stop drinking and he wants to be everything that I deserve. I, of corse, was sobbing. A couple tears were running down his checks as well, it was a great moment. Our relationship has been amazing. We've said to each other a bunch of times that we're like how we use to be...it's nice to have that feeling again, and know that he has it too.

This new MOD at school is by far the hardest. Anatomy and EKG (electrocardiography). So far I've learned a TON about blood, circulation, and the heart. 4 tests so far, (2 100's) and still no B's! Knock on wood.

Brodie has grown up SO much in just a few weeks. He is really crawling, he can stand on his own for a few seconds, he stood up in his crib for the first time today! (Pic later) Can't wait for his 9 month checkup. (doc's office was so busy they can't see him for 3 weeks!)

Here is Brodie crawling, starting at 6 months crawling backwords to turning his body, to army crawling to finally crawling for real. Enjoy!

The greatest thing that has happened is I am growing closer to God everyday. I have never had this type of relationship with Him before. I feel like a completely different person. I have kept true to my word, reading the Bible almost every day, going to church every Sunday, and praying everyday. I never realized how great the Bible is! I've never had any desire to read it but it's like a thirst for me now that has to be quenched. This is my favorite verse I've read so far that's really helped me in this tough time:

"Do not worry what shall we eat or what shall we wear for your Heavenly Father knows that you need them. Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness and all these things will be given to you. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:31-34

From now on I'm going to leave ya'll with a verse. Hope everyone has a great rest of the week!

Easter 2010

Holy Moly..I hate having no time to blog, it all runs together and I literally have anxiety until I get everything out. So while Harland makes din din, I will write :).

Brodie had his first Easter (such an exciting holiday for a baby...but aren't they all!?). We went to church then my Uncle and Aunts house.

Cousin Michael with a pink stroller...


Allie in the bounce house

Brodie going down a slide for the first time!


(Not a huge fan.)

After the Easter Egg Hunt, Brodie scored two eggs haha.

Then we went to Dustin's Parents house for another Easter Egg Hunt.

Addy looooves Brodie, can you tell?

Sonia helping Ily put eggs in her basket

They were even until Brodie sat down...Ily went flying! ahha

Me and some short old man. :)

Two of my favorite girls!

Then we played Red Neck Golf... classic pics. (We beat Nick and Dustin both times...but what's new? muahaha)

Two AMAZING meals in one day. Great Holiday.

Brodie Bear....

...is

-getting closer to REALLY crawling everyday. I videotape everytime he starts scooting HOPING I can get his first real crawl on tape. But I'm sure it'll be when I'm at work or school.

-says Mama everyday.

-is starting to pull up, he gets one foot all the way up and the other one's stuck...and he starts yelling. haha

-makes what my sister calls the "butthole" mouth on command. haha

-stands holding onto something with one hand

-claps when you clap

-grunts when you grunt

-is starting to reach out to me when he wants me to pick him up (my fave)

-wears 9mo-18mo clothes.

-eats 2 jars of food and a bottle at most feedings

School

ohhhh school. I try to tell myself I don't hate it. buuut I do. can't wait to graduate!!! I'm in my 3rd Mod bc I took off a month to work when Harland didn't have work for what turned out to be a whopping 4 days. Anyways, I've made all A's on every test, project, quiz, and presentation...not just for this class but in everything I've done so far this year. Pretty proud of myself...but I don't think (actually I know) this wouldn't be the case without Brodie. We're doing urinalisis and such right now. Bleh.

Oh! And I might have changed my Major to Cardiovascular Sonography. They make about $200,000 a year, instead of Diagnostic Sonography who make approx $100,000. I'm not nearly as interested in the heart as I am with babies obviously, but for an extra $100,000 a year I think I could be! We'll see...

Work

Love the people I work with...hate the job. Can't wait to not serve ungrateful assholes.

Social Life (ha.) Well I did manage to find some time to enjoy myself the last couple of weeks...

Went to Orb with Sonia, Nick, and the rest of that crew for a few hours.

The next weekend we went to another bar for her cousin's bday

Monday was my friend Jen's babyshower... everyone from work was there...definitely the best babyshower I've ever been to. Beerbongs and shots of crown? You know I was making an appearance. I would put up pics but DAVID..sucks. :) David, Brehn, "Kamwin" (cough cough), and I got her the carseat she registered for. She got hooked UP from everyone at work!

The next weekend Harland and I went to my good friend Shantae's bday dinner at Houlihans (OMG AMAZING!) in Addison. New favorite spot! It was so good to see Shantae...he's one of the funniest, down to earth, wisest people I know. We definitely need to get together more often!

The next night we went to Jessica & Cody's. They brought their A game with fajitas and margaritas! Sadly for them they did not bring their A game playing Buzz Word, and got schooled 3 times in a row. and it was our first time playing. Their son Parker is 2 weeks older then Brodie and definitely showed him up in preeeetty much every single way. Crawling all over the place, pulling himself up...that boy's gonna be smart!

Harland & I
We're doing great...just wishing we could spend more time together! He just brought me in a salad and is making dinner as soon as he walks in the door from work...I guess I should go help!


Love, peace, and chicken grease.